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High School Marybeth vs. College Marybeth

April 6, 2011

I have mixed feelings on my high school years.

I can certainly remember the good times. I had amazing friends, I traveled and performed with a top notch band, and I definitely learned more about myself than I realized then.

And I can vividly remember the tough times, no matter how I try to block them out. The frustration with school work, with teachers, with other people, the awkwardness. Oh the awkwardness.

If I could, would I go back and make myself better? Less shy? Braver? Work harder? Nope! I don’t think I can explain it any better than Steve Carell’s character, Frank, in the movie Little Miss Sunshine when he describes the French writer, Marcel Proust:

Yeah. French writer. Total loser. Never had a real job. Unrequited love affairs. Gay. Spent 20 years writing a book almost no one reads. But he’s also probably the greatest writer since Shakespeare. Anyway, he uh… he gets down to the end of his life, and he looks back and decides that all those years he suffered, Those were the best years of his life, ’cause they made him who he was. All those years he was happy? You know, total waste. Didn’t learn a thing. So, if you sleep until you’re 18… Ah, think of the suffering you’re gonna miss. I mean high school? High school-those are your prime suffering years. You don’t get better suffering than that.

(I looked for a video of the scene, but could only find it in Spanish, but its worth the watch anyway. Enjoy.)

Through my “suffering” I learned some important things.  For example, I learned that I hate math but love Spanish classes. I eventually learned to hold myself with more confidence, and if there happens to be someone who doesn’t want to be your friend for seemingly no reason, then maybe you don’t want to be friends with them in the first place. I learned a person gets more respect when they try hard, even if they aren’t the best. All the lessons I’ve learned, I’ve carried on into college, and I’ve built upon them.  So I wouldn’t change anything.

WELL… I wouldn’t change much. Here are four things I might poke at.

 

1. I’d tell myself to start learning about the world. There was no reason to be trapped in East Cobb like I was, I should have been reading books taking place in Prague and watching movies set in  Barcelona ages ago.

emersonmade.com

 

 

 

 

2. I’m thinking my mom was probably right; maybe I should have dressed more my age. Fewer t-shirts, fewer flipflops,  more dressing up. Now I have countless fashion blogs on my google reader and I love online window shopping for fun pieces. Oh, how things change.

 

 

 

 

 

3. I would tell myself to chill. I am, and have been, a fairly laid-back person, but in high school many things can feel like THE END OF THE WORLD! when they were anything but.  Messed up an audition? Not a big deal.  Someone was mean to you? Chill out. Don’t understand math? A big who cares. There’s life after high school.

 

4. Finally, I’d have to break it to myself that there was no one at my high school who could match Heath Ledger from 10 Things I Hate About You.  High School boys are gross and silly. I know, I know, you think that one guy has potential, but I’m sorry. He’s just going to end up a fat, drunk kid at college. Believe me, I know.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. April 10, 2011 3:56 pm

    I dont think that high school boys are gross being that I was one of them.. Lol

  2. Brooklyn permalink
    April 26, 2011 6:43 pm

    I completely agree, especially about number 4.

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